I'm Different Now

Sunday morning we were at a host home, and I was up early. I needed a file folder out of the trunk so I went through the kitchen door, closing it behind me, and raised the garage door to get to our car. Upon returning I found that the kitchen door was locked from the outside, and I was stuck in the garage.

At that point something odd happened: I laughed. Not a synical laugh or a laugh of derision, but a good natured laugh. I closed the garage door and waited, instead of banging until I woke our host. I studied my notes while I waited and listened to the wind and rain outside the garage walls. I also took note that not that long ago I would have been outraged that I had been so stupid as to get locked out.

God has changed me over the last eight years in ways that are only now becoming apparent, and the transformation process has accelerated since we started our missions journey. Another example is that on Wednesday I lost our family video camera. Ouch. That’s an expensive thing to misplace. I lost it on the way home from Iowa. On our way to Wisconsin yesterday there was one place we could check, but it wasn’t there. Years ago, I would have been in a deep slump over losing something like that.

Truly, if I can’t find it, there’s nothing I can do about it, I need to try and be more careful, and move on with life. This week I realized I had done that. I even felt a little bad for not feeling worse about it.

I guesse my point here is that for me a consequence of pursuing missions has been a greater maturity, and a deepening of my spiritual understanding. Namely, an understand that in light of eternity things have little value. Also, in light of eternity trials and difficult times are quite small.

What a blessing for me. I used to get so bent out of shape when things didn’t go how I thought they should. I can’t guarantee that I’ll never lose my temper again or get upset about something, but my perspective on life has changed so much, that it is changing how I react to circumstances. What a blessing. Raising support has been difficult considering our current economic climate, but even in that God continues to give me energy as I grow in my certainty that He is in control.